When I was a teen in highschool… I was in a weightlifting gym class and I did soccer. When is get home, for a snack if have a party pizza (or two). Probably went through a carton of milk myself. God my mom was so pissed. I was probably half or grocery budget alone for a few years
That’s because that isn’t food.
No, it’s because teenage boys eat a lot
Source: was teenage boy, ate a lot
Cereal isn’t food? I am curious to hear your logic here…
I’m sure you could scarf down an entire party size bag of Doritos on your own as well. That doesn’t make it a good or preferred source of nutrition.
Try asking the kid if he can routinely scarf down a dozen eggs every morning. He won’t, unless he’s the size of Andre The Giant, because that’s actual food that will correctly signal satiety.
https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/are-breakfast-cereals-healthy#sugar-carbs
Anyways I assume the story is referring to the industrial sludge Americans call “breakfast cereal”, garbage that is designed to be addictive. And not, say, some kind of ancestral Kashi type of thing.
If it were actual food, you wouldn’t be able to eat so much of it. Nothing in nature would have been easily available in industrial quantities like that, making it extremely unlikely we evolved to eat so much of it. It’s engineered to be that way.
I could eat an entire fucking box of plain “corn flakes” if you let me when I was 16. No sugar, no milk. Was some store brand knock off cereal too. Didn’t even have added sugar. Was basically cardboard flakes.
But fuck did I love them. I miss those shitty ass cereals now everything has a pound of added sugar ):
Name checks out…
I’m still can’t believe some crazy guy 100 years ago convinced the whole country that eating sugar with milk is somehow a healthy breakfast. And the same guy convinced the same country to do the genital mutilation on male infants.
Kellogg’s theory was that bland foods that were full of fiber would stop people from masturbating.
Because he didn’t approve of that kind of icky nonsense.
So I think the sugar came later.
I think Graham of Graham crackers was working with a similar concept.
You’re combining the two Kellogg brothers. One thought that pleasure was sin, and that a good diet should be as bland as possible to maintain piety. The other thought his brother’s cereal tasted like shit and was really hard to market and sell, until he added sugar and salt, then subsequently became filthy rich.
Ironically, pre-sugared cereal may have also reduced the amount of sugar in kids’ cereal. For a while, kids were taking regular cereal and dumping sugar on it. Instead of actually parenting and telling them no, the parents started buying sugary cereal.
Yeah true but it’s so fucking good sometimes
Genital mutilation?
Don’t fucking judge my breakfast
And both were done with the goal of reducing masturbation.
Knowing better has a full day’s worth of content on this, if you’d like to know more
Cereal is the most delicious thing in the universe that doesn’t require anything more than pouring two things into a bowl. No peeling, heating, mixing, blending, layering, etc. Two things, in a bowl, and you don’t use goes back in the place it came from.
That bowl was a little big for me, I’ll just drain the milk back into the jug and put these soggy bits back in the box.
y’know, the kids in africa and all
Kids in Africa also don’t like soggy cereal?
I thought the rock stars fixed that ages ago.
If you use a funnel to pour the cereal into the jug, you can have a swig of soggy bits on demand!
Until one day, when you’re eating soup and innocently toss in some croutons, only to realize that what you’re eating is essentially cereal: savory edition, which you find so inexplicably disgusting that you can’t even stomach the thought of regular cereal for a depressing amount of time

“Ugh I hate clam chowder. Its just hot ocean milk with dead animal croutons.”
It’s the best when you’re baked too. It really helps with the dry mouth
homercerealfire.gif
I usually eat it dry with a glass of oat milk on the side.
Excuse me, you can pour crack and pop rocks into a bowl.
Depends which cereal we’re talking about. I’ve watching those ‘lets make lucky charms / something with chocolate’ videos and they’re basically making a complicated soup, solidifying it, and cutting it up into tiny pieces, just to make a basic soup of milk afterwards.
The weirdest thing to me was realising zalot of cereals already contain milk. Actual liquid milk, that is, baked in.
To be fair, my husband will just have 6 bowls of cereal in a row all of a sudden.
But my son… here he is with his mixing bowl.
Edit: when my son went through a miso soup phase, he would get the big mixing bowl and use a whole block of tofu. Probably straight up 2L of miso broth. For context, he is 6’2” and 19.
Your son is producing fewer dishes. Be better, husband.
Husband does reuse the bowl though. He is not a monster.
That or he’s really good at hiding it…
I saw this in a movie once. Ever since I thought it was super normal to do this and always got so sick.
Friday
No it’s Thursday
This is Patrick
Friday here
It’s human kibble basically
Try this:
- instead of a giant bowl pour a regular bowl with extra milk
- when you finish the cereal do not drink the milk
- pour more cereal
- repeat as desired

I unironically wish this was a thing. And was halfway decent and nutritious.
This is what I would refer to the extra big bags of cereal as when living with a friend and it was his turn to do grocery shopping.
“1x bachelor chow cinnamon crunch, 1x fruity pebbles.”
And after about halfway through the third bowl you begin to regret everything
Food pellets.
The milk gets too warm.
Bachelor chow!
I knew a family that told their adult teenage son he could only have one bowl of cereal in the morning and that is what he did.
Is it possible to learn this power?
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Just get a mixing bowl and put the whole box it and a half a gallon of milk in it and eat it like Otto did. Guy was 6’2" and two fifty at the time.
Oh. So like what he does already. Got it. 🤦♀️
No. He was eating a whole box of cereal using a small bowl. He was told he could only have one bowl so he switch to a large bowl. How is this hard to comprehend?










