Who does this? The condiments would be gone half way through this way. You gotta get them down the sides.
Cause those dogs were bred for show.
I use mustard on the bun first, like glue for the weiner. (2nd grade level giggle) Then i pile on the onions, relish, or whatever on top
I slather the crease in relish, then tuck diced tomatoes/onion/lettuce (eg) into the relish, then dog, then presentation mustard.
relish from the grocery store has gotten so cheaply made you have to strain it first. even, and especially, the mass market ‘name brands’. i did run across one super off-brand, imported from turkey or india or something, that was great, though… and like half the store brand price.
so unless i have that or strain the ‘regular’ stuff first, or just cut-up some pickles instead (what i’ve been doing more of lately), the relish goes on top. everything else goes on first.
The Heinz relish aint so bad… i use it and its ok. I miss the Coney Island deli we used to have here 20 years ago… its become a laundry now.
Onions and mustard? You must be an antifa terrorist!
So the first half is all the good stuff, and the second half is just mustard?
Sgt chowdown doesn’t appreciate this post.
Dishonorable discharge for Sgt Chowchow
No no no, wrong guy, Sgt ChowChow is entrusted with US Nuclear facility codes under admiral Hugh Mann. Now those are names you can trust.
I don’t trust the admiral. I think he’s gunning for my job.
you’re supposed to eat a hotdog end to end, you weirdo
I mean, yeah, you eat both ends. From the top down, though.
Shitpost aside, my dad did honey mustard under the dog while topping it with chili and cheese. It’s the only way to do that combo right.
Never used honey mustard, but classic yellow mustard in a chili cheese dog is always great.
I’m confused. If I put mustard on a hotdog it looks exactly like that.
(Aside from that bland yellow, I use real mustard)
So you like eating all the mustard right away, and then having the second half be plain?
How the fuck you eating your hotdog?
what the fuck
The fuck?
I have a new pet peev
Ohh you eat it like a sub? 😅
I only do that if I’m lazy and use sandwich bread for a roll.
Im sorry, people eat subs differently than hot dogs? Fucking excuse me?
No, I eat a sub from the side. Otherwise you’d just be eating bread, then fillings, then bread separately.
OP is the type of guy who takes a shit and stands up to wipe his ass.
Sir this is not a Wendy’s
How dare they want to do a good job wiping
I actually do this now because wiping my ass on the toilet gave me a herniated disc. The standing up is way more forgiving to the spine.
You put it on top so that the flavor of the condiments doesn’t overpower each bite.
If you put it on top, condiments is all you’d taste for the first few bites, then it would just be a plain dog the rest of the way. Why would anyone do that?
How are you getting plain dog after first few bites? I’m picturing you eating a hot dog like corn on the cob
Top down, like everyone else. How do you eat them?
You deep throat that thing like God intended.
Those aren’t mutually exclusive
What do you mean “gone half way through”?
It’s simply there, and then it isn’t. There is no intermediary state.
You should try Schrodinger’s mustard. You haven’t had a proper hotdog until you top it with a superposition.
I don’t have time to observe the hotdog before it’s gone, anyways, so I always at least have mustard on my hotdog, even if I also don’t have mustard on my hotdog.
owenfromcanada eats hot dogs the short way.
Fitting the entire width in your mouth at once must be a challenge, but I’ll accept it.
When you eat as fast as I do, everything is eaten the short way
Replace that boring mustard with spicy brown and that’s exactly how I do a dog.
Under? So the first half is just plain dog?
Are you eating your dogs sideways? Every bite has mustard on it.
I’m eating them top down like everyone else. So if you don’t get condiments along the side of the dog, they’re gone after the first few bites.
You’re supposed to eat them from the bottom up. That’s how monkeys do it in the wild, so obviously it’s how we evolved to eat hotdogs.
Sometimes aesthetics trump evolution
Under. So the mustard is less likely to glop onto your shirt
People with big mouths (like me, I have a big mouth) eat hotdogs in bites that span left to right, and top to bottom along (approximately) a plane that lies perpendicular to the axis along which the hotdog was extruded. With this approach, the condiments merely have to run the length of the hotdog (or just the bun if you dislike messy eating) in order for them to participate in every bite.
Only small mouth dweebs that can’t fit a wide, juicy frank into their mouth when they’re gobbling down a… Nevermind, I think I got sidetracked.
No dawg, you gotta flip it turn-ways.
What I dislike about hot dogs is the fact that the sausage is bigger than the buns, like you’d never see a burger where the partty is spilling out of the bun too much, why are hot dog sausages not similar in size to hot dog buns, I want smaller sausage or bigger bun so that I can fit more toppings and condiments on it without any of it spilling out from the sides with every bite, a plain sausage and bun is boring for me.
The sausage being too big is a more common complaint than people realize. Everyone assumes bigger is always better, but past a certain size it can be uncomfortable or even painful.
You can work your way up to bigger sausages, though. Take your time, try to stay relaxed, and don’t forget to use a condiment!
Top comment
Sometimes I can’t even fit my mouth around it
Some people think it’s normal to experience pain and even bleeding when eating a sausage for the first time, but with gentle stretching you can usually mitigate any discomfort. A few minutes a day for a few weeks is often enough. Be sure to have open lines of communication and a strong trust relationship with your chef.
A friend keeps reminding me about the time I told him I got 2 footlongs in me one time
Lmao what? I’ve never heard of of anything asking for a more imbalanced meat to bun ratio.
What other toppings are you trying to add? If a Chicago dog can have all its toppings with a polish sausage there’s no reason a normal hot dog couldn’t hold more of what you need.
I disagree, I feel like the bread to dog ratio is always slightly too high, and I end up tearing some roll off
I just position mine so the end is how I want it, and sometimes that means the first bite is mostly bread.
ITT: I cannot believe the debate over hot dog size, bun size, and condiment application, lol.
And what’s the deal with hot dogs coming in packs of 6, and buns in 8? Atleast if it was the other way around, we could shove’em up our asses and call it a day. Laugh track, followed by stupid Seinfeld jingle
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S NOT BRATWURST
Thanks a bunch OP. Now I have a new peeve.
Who tf out here is putting bread around their hotdogs??
What do you do? Slide them straight down your gullet and eat the bread separate like Kobayashi?
Excuse me, FridaySteve, but I sit on them like a proper gentleman.
I admire the direct approach.
Seems like it would save everyone some time
