Chaotic Good Karen.
“RFK questions guidance on not putting spring rolls up your anus.”
Is that him or the worm talking?
Maybe the worm likes spring rolls.
FLARED. BASE.
Hindsight is always 20/20.
I have so many questions about the train of thought that led to this… situation.
I reckon a friend of theirs was looking for something real hard.
I know right?! You could fit your entire wallet in there, and they’d never guess the password!
Don’t ask how I know this, I don’t have any trucknuts…
It’s the fried ones that are the problem: crispy = sharp edges = torn bowel = septic shock = dead.
The fresh ones with the squishy exterior should feel much more like a penis going into your ass. Choose the sauce carefully - your entire GI tract has receptors sensitive to spiciness.
If you want to push the spicy level but not have a visit from Satan’s eyeball, they make this great barrier ointment called Ilex. Just, uh, you have to be careful not to glue your butt cheeks closed to most folk put some Vaseline on afters. Who knows, maybe they’ve fixed that but i last used it regularly when I wanted to belong to the nuclear taco club but couldn’t get Thursdays off, it’s been a minute.
My body, my choice.
Doctor: can you at least wait a few seconds after you take them out of the deep fryer next time?
Fuckin’ big pharma. I ain’t sticking Pfizer’s goddamn wantons up there, I’m sticking with PF Changs just like my paw-pee and his pee-paw before 'em.
Well DUH! It’s summer idiots.
I’m sure you can get frozen spring rolls
Tik Tok challenges are really going to another level.
“Insert from other end”
Doctors are giving this patient a new idea he’d never considered before.
If I insert the spring rolls into my ass, will I shit them out from my mouth?
I think there is only one way to find out…
Well, I wasn’t going to before, but now I am wondering what hidden secrets they are keeping from us??
Breaking news
…unless you heat them up first, to kill the bacteria; two minutes on HIGH ought to do it.
