- For simplicity, let’s assuming this is your country, in some random rural area
- The dead person has a kitchen knife plunged into their chest, blood is still fresh
- The dead person is a random stanger, you’ve never met them, they are just a random average (non-famous) person
- There is no one else in the house
- You have a tiny bit of blood on your clothes, but not a lot, you are unsure of whose blood it is
- You have no injuries
- You were never drugged or anything, you just happen to mysteriously, spontaneously get teleported there, while sleeping. You went to sleep on your bed and just woke up only to find yourself in this scenario. (Bloodtests will show nothing)
- You wake up right in the morning, at sunrise
- There is electricity and running water, small amounts of food in the refrigerator, enough for maybe a day
- You don’t have any items with you, not your phone, nothing beside the clothes you slept with (if any). There are clothing in this house belonging to the dead person
- There only electronics devices (besides appliances) in the house is the dead person’s smartphone, in their pockets (no lockscreen codes or anything), and a laptop (no password). This house has wifi.
- This house does not have any security cameras.
- There is a car in the driveway, belonging to the dead person. No other vehicles, no bikes or anything like that.
- Nobody (yet) knows this person is dead. They live alone.
So, would you think that you did the murder, and just turn yourself in; or assume someone set you up and try to escape? How would you escape this scenario and avoid prison?
Remember, this is a rural area, not that many cameras.
So do you make a run for it? How?
Or do you just call the authorities and hope you don’t get charged with the murder? Very awkward interrogation tho, nobody would believe you. I doubt “I don’t remember how I got there” is a strong defence.
What is your “game plan”?
Well I’m a trans American. So I’m gonna run because if I tell the cops what happened the better scenarios involve dying quickly
Immediately close all the windows, lock the doors, and check the body for maggots. Checking the body for maggots will clearly indicate about how long they have been deceased. With the windows and doors blocking out view from the outside, you can then use this information to make the critical decision of whether to have intercourse with the corpse or not.
critical decision of whether to have intercourse with the corpse or not
We need Lemmy Gold for this 🤣
Hmm yes. Only issue with is there would have to be flys buzzing around to lay eggs into the corpse. If there are no flys them you’re in the clear.
Feels so wiggly.
I’d probably remove the knife and plunge it into my own chest. This all feels like way too much work to deal with.
You gotta wash it first, you don’t want an infection
I doubt that you would have had the courage to do that.
It is difficult to write exactly what a person would do in such a case, most people can write one thing, but if this really happened to them, it is highly likely that they would act differently. I don’t see the point of trying to run away or hide the crime, neither morally nor logically, the only good idea is to call the police, in any case, even if you try to hide the murder, murder is a murder, you know, a crime, and secondly, it may come up in the future and you will have bigger problems.
Yup, my presence is going to leave some kind of evidence so might as well call it in but don’t say anything about why you are there to the cops and just lawyer up.
I’d think I’d better start setting up my S.P.E.C.I.A.L. stats and collecting bottle caps.
I am playing GTA V and have just swapped players to Trevor and I will continue playing as such
I’m not going to prison, and the police are unlikely to believe me. So I would dispose of the body best I could, scrub my shit down, and start going south until I hit Mexico.
“Again? Ok, no more ambian and rum, this time I am serious.”
First see if the blood pattern tells me anything of value. Next steps are to find peroxide to clean my clothes of blood and if I am out of luck, improvise. Then I’d see if I can figure anything out about what happened. Wipe off the knife handle, scrub under my nails with bleach, cut the phone lines to the house, break the back door or a window, find anything of value to steal and bury nearby for later retrieval, then do some shots of alcohol, get in the backseat of the car and touch a bunch of stuff in the car, puke, and start walking along the road until I can flag someone down and ask to use their phone to call the cops.
After that is just a matter of knowing nothing besides going to bed after 2 Ambien and a hearty amount of 94 proof rum and waking up in the unfamiliar car and stumbling into the house and finding the stranger dead, didn’t have my phone, didn’t look for their phone because I wanted to GTFO in case the murderer was still there, went to get help and here we are.
Best case no big problem, worst case I get a few charges that won’t stick unless the victim’s phone can prove I did it. If it can prove I did it, rip bozo.
For a probably more sane view, my wife said she would probably call the authorities.
I would use the victim’s laptop to figure out where I was, and their phone to call my wife to have her begin driving in my direction with the intention of meeting her on the way. Then using bleach based cleaning supplies or worst case a wet rag, wipe down any surfaces I might have touched, including the knife. Then use the victim’s car to the nearest interstate observing all traffic laws to meet my wife along the agreed upon route. I remove any cash in the house and gas cans if available.
I’m not investigating those bullet points. First thing I’m doing is trying to get help for myself, and getting “help”/police for the dead person. And also a lawyer for myself.
Getting help for myself includes contacting people at home, confirming the timeline and alibi.
