Tear off the branch and measure the total length.
Method C. Sounding rod depth required to hit the prostate.
I know it sounds odd to do this on a tree, but trust me, it works.
Thrust*
THE CYLINDER MUST NOT BE HARMED!!!
it took me way to long to realize y’all talking about penises …
That’s so innocent. Almost like a certain mythical character before opening her eponymous box…
I thought it was optimal street pathways at first, then trees, then got surprised by the amount of genitalia referencing comments then I “realised” thanks to this comment TT
This was my process exactly!
Well, it’s two of us.
I can’t use method B, the tree fruit are in the way.
Half the length plus seven
Woop woop, 7.5cm! A personal best.
I would use 0,5x(A+B) because chicks dig a big branch.
You have to push the branch down with one hand, such that it is perpendicular to the trunk. With the other hand place a ruler to measure trunk to tip via method A. This gives the honest expectation of ''usable" length.
This can be easily calculated by the formula [(length x diameter) + (Weight / Girth)] / Angle of Tip^2
This is the way. You have to account for the yaw of the shaft
Shine a light directly down on it from above. Measure the shadow
I measured like this when my first girlfriend asked what my size was. I told her it was 10". Suffice to say, she was definitely not impressed when the pants came off for the first time. 😅
I mean you joke but the actual rule of thumb is measuring from the crotch of the branch.
Personally I start measuring from the middle of my taint 😌
Since the internet began it’s been known that you always measure asshole to tip.
Literally how every guy on Grindr measures…
Ah, my misunderstanding
What if there’s a … um … protuberance on the bottom where the branch meets the trunk? What’s the correct measuring procedure in that case?
It’s critical the cylinder not be harmed
It’s a perfectly normal cylinder size.
Loggers should be called arbortionists.
Measure from the roots
