Make eye contact. Aggressively.
I do better with an audience.
Look at the brave one here, closing the door and risking their clean air supply. If I’ve had any dairy in the last 4 days, I always leave the door open.
Push
Being an over the road trucker has cured me of all poop shyness and public toilet squeamishness. Dump out in the company of some of the foulest humans to ever grace these American byways. Kinda cathartic in a fucked up sorta way.
No problem. I stand to pee and only shit at home.
First, I’d hang a long drapey sweater over the window so no one can see, then I’d drop trou, sit down, and unleash something that sounds like The Board from Control for five minutes straight, rattling windows and evacuating departments, then wipe, flush, wash hands, put my sweater back on, and leave.
Maybe this is just a door with a mosaic mirror, and OP is a vampire.
Jesus, I’ve literally had nightmares like this
I would make the most intense eye contact toward anyone daring to darken my doorstep.
