• NottaLottaOcelot@lemmy.ca
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    7 days ago

    1). Society tells women they need to do things “preventively” to avoid becoming hideous goblins in a few years. That’s why you see 22 year olds getting Botox - they have been told they have to start paying NOW to avoid wrinkles

    2). Hollywood and entertainment media have normalized unrealistic standards. And you can’t become a newcomer in that space without conforming to the employable look

    3). Gossip media loves to pick apart any millimetre of fat (“Is ______ pregnant? Click to see her baby bump!”) or photo taken in bad lighting (“What is wrong with ______ ‘s health, click to see what our medical specialists have to say”). And then they love to chastise people after they give into plastic surgery (“Click to see ______’s terrible nose job, why DID she do it??”)

    Billions of dollars are made making women feel shitty. Nobody is going to let that cash go because morals.

    • velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 days ago

      This meme is part of the system here as well.

      No one in this thread is complaining about ugly women getting these procedures done. They want women to be attractive, but only on their terms.

      • NottaLottaOcelot@lemmy.ca
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        7 days ago

        Yes it’s irritating that society can celebrate the good qualities of men who aren’t physically attractive (sense of humour, intelligence, kindness, etc.) but has such trouble accepting that a woman who isn’t physically attractive can have worthwhile qualities. We can’t seem to compute when a woman decides that she has other priorities.

  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    My wife has been getting GLP-1 ads constantly. She weighs 110 lb and has struggled with anorexic tendencies since she was a teenager. Consumerism has no conscience.

  • velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 days ago

    I kind of hate that this implies “ugly” women will not be judged here for using the same beauty procedures as already attractive women.

    Not to mention that these beauty procedures are also sought out by men.

      • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        That requires the hideous mods she did to her face?

        She was super super pretty, even if not your type, she looked great. Wtf did she do.

        • velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          6 days ago

          She lost a shit ton of weight because of Graves’ disease. Edit: I just remembered, the steroids used to treat Graves’ disease also affect how your face looks.

          She also had some work done, but not anything more than any other actress has generally.

    • ceenote@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      There’s no question that judging women by their appearance is a widespread problem, but doing expensive/unsafe medical things for the sake of appearance is also about personality.

      • Zorque@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        Yes… a personality often built off the unhealthy relationship society has with women’s physical appearance. Sure, women can not care, but their lives will often unfortunately be much more difficult for it. Even accounting for the effort put into their appearance. These things are not so easily divorced in reality as they are in online discussions.

        • ceenote@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          I’m not ignoring societal pressures, but at some point you have to take responsibility for your priorities. I assume you wouldn’t excuse billionaires as just participating in capitalism and doing what they’re “supposed” to do. The harm of invasive medical procedures and medications for aesthetic reasons seems like a good place to draw the line and say “you have a problem”

    • LouNeko@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      Am I supposed to know Ariana Grande on some deep interpersonal level to realize that she looks like a walking corpse?

      • shweddy@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        A fun fact about opinions is that you can keep that shit to yourself. I dont know you but I’m not gonna offer my opinion cuz no one asked. Just because we all have a soapbox doesn’t mean we gotta use it

        • HazardousBanjo@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          A fun fact about opinions is that you can keep that shit to yourself

          Good thing they didn’t offer an opinion.

          Ariana Grande looks insanely unhealthy, like a skeleton, and appears to be in a health crisis with either ED or GLP1 abuse.

          That isn’t an opinion, that’s a fact. She’s undeniably not naturally that bone thin, nor that inactive during her performances like she’s been recently.

          • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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            7 days ago

            Wow she responded to Lemmy

            “The body that you’ve been comparing my current body to was the unhealthiest version of my body. I was on a lot of antidepressants and drinking on them and eating poorly,” she said. “[I was] at the lowest point of my life when I looked the way you consider my healthy, but that in fact wasn’t my healthy.”

            (Actually April 2023)

            https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/ariana-grande-address-concerns-about-body-lowest-point-1234713153/

            OK all done with celebrity stuff for the month then! :) cared enough to quickly search once and accidentally found this^ but not opining

            • HazardousBanjo@lemmy.world
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              7 days ago

              This might be shocking to learn, but someone who’s clearly going through a health crisis and is clearly extremely unhealthy due to an ED or GLP1 misuse, may actually lie about being unhealthy to get the scrutiny off of them.

              Not to mention Ariana went 30+ years not looking like an actual skeleton. No way in fuck her prior body was less healthy.

    • HazardousBanjo@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      I think its reasonable to bring attention to the extremely harmful act of women, who are held by society as the beauty standard, are anorexic or abusing weight loss drugs when it isn’t necessary.

      We have countless studies on the ill effects idolizing women with unrealistic body standards, especially to the point they’re harming themselves to achieve them, has on women and young girls. This recent revival of the “heroine chick” beauty standard via eating disorders and GLP1 abuse is a nightmare to the psyche of women and girls, and also does damage the psyche of men and young boys for that matter.

      • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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        7 days ago

        “Heroin chic” is the fashion of looking starved and shadowed as if you’re a heroin addict.

        “Heroine chick” is Supergirl

  • CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Because society tells attractive women our value is primarily being attractive and losing that is scary since most people aren’t willing to give up the only thing that makes them valuable

    • interrobang@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 days ago

      When I got fat, people were assholes to me so much more often. They had no patience for me, it was crazy. I got back in shape and I’m worth courtesy and kindness again, apparently.

      I’m afraid of aging in part because I’m scared to lose that basic human decency again.

  • robocall@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    I lost about 100lbs on a prescription similar to ozempic. The world is much kinder to me now. I got a promotion, more hours working, society is friendlier and kinder. I would recommend anyone considering it talk to their doctor.

    • bizarroland@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      I also lost about 100 pounds by eating one meal a day and walking a lot and using the EC stack.

      In the span of seven years, I nearly quintupled my income.

  • daannii@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Dude my gorgeous friend 38 getting filler. Now looks like she’s ate some shellfish she’s allergic to.

    Keeps getting it every 6 months or so.

    Just awful.

    I can’t tell her cause that will make her feel even worse.

    God I hope she stops. I’m angry at the advertisement and grifters that convinced her she needed it.

    We are both millennials. Aka ageless women. None of us even look our age anyway. And she’s thinking she needs to fix her perfect face.

    Idk. I just reject all that nonsense. I’m ready to experience this whole life. I want to be an older woman when I’m older. I don’t want to be one way forever. Boring.

    But culture tells women they are worthless when they are less fuckable. I hate it.

    • FellowEnt@sh.itjust.works
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      7 days ago

      My wife, 38, objectively gorgeous, is fully on the botox train and it breaks my heart. Feels like its so prevalent a sizeable chunk of the population must have full on body dysmorphia.

    • halfeatenpotato@sh.itjust.works
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      7 days ago

      We are both millennials. Aka ageless women. None of us even look our age anyway.

      Is this a thing?? I’m a millennial and don’t look my age and have noticed the same for plenty of other women around my age. I’ve always wondered about it, but hadn’t heard of it in a broad sense.

      • daannii@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        Yeah it’s kind of a running joke but true. I suspect it’s because of sunscreen and a lot of us never smoked. Idk. Our generation just seems to look younger.

        People can’t believe I’m in my 40s now. I also have a baby-face so that just adds to it. And I’ve always been good about wearing face sunscreen because im pasty and burn easy.

        Never smoked.

        Also no kids.

        I see the generations after us looking older than us. I don’t know what changed.

        • halfeatenpotato@sh.itjust.works
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          4 days ago

          Heavy makeup is a thing for the older generations and the younger generations.

          I think I’ve only worn full face makeup 3x in my life. If/when I ever do put on makeup, it’s typically mascara. Every now and then eyeliner and eyeshadow. That’s literally it.

          • daannii@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            That could also be a factor. I too wear no makeup most days. And even when I do it’s a little macara or something. Haven’t worn full face makeup since a few times as a teenager for like homecoming or something

          • daannii@lemmy.world
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            6 days ago

            Ive been washing my face with bar soap since I was a teen. That’s my skincare routine. And I grew up eating junk food. Though I do eat better now. 🤷

            • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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              6 days ago

              I’m the same but with moisturizer (I typically make my own out of cocoa butter, coconut oil, and olive oil) and sunscreen. Also I don’t wear foundation and only wear makeup for nights out and other occasions. I get the occasional zit, but my face is aging gracefully for now.

              My hair on the other hand, I do very little for and is a disaster.

              But yeah I think that it’s really possible to overdo skincare, especially if you buy into all the propaganda that the beauty industry puts out.

      • Muffi@programming.dev
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        7 days ago

        Having children takes a huge toll on the body. Millennials tend to have none or a lot fewer children than previous generations. Also, millennials eat way healthier and smoke less than their parents and grandparents.

        • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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          6 days ago

          Alcohol, too. While I do believe many/most did the whole “social life is at the bar” out of high school, I think millennials were the generation that started breaking the cycle more and started doing more things while drunk (like board game bars, video game bars, escape rooms, etc), and then transitioned to not getting as drunk so they could do the things better and not be as much of a burden on those around them who weren’t just trying to get wasted for the night.

          Also more options that weren’t as destructive as alcohol for those that still wanted to get fucked up. And less judgement about those options.

    • vrek@programming.dev
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      8 days ago

      This is probably the truth. Probably not root cause(that’s society, women being taught to depend on men, shows teaching women their value is in looks and not brains etc) but it’s likely the closest cause of this.

  • MiddleAgesModem@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Not a woman, so I could be full of shit. It does seem to me that women face much more pressure to be conventionally attractive, especially in image-intensive jobs like acting.

    • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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      7 days ago

      Very true, and already-attractive women started being told how pretty they were while they were younger so it became part of their identity and sense of self-worth. So they’re vulnerable to the fear of “losing their looks.”

    • daannii@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      A lot is advertising. Dude im 40F. It’s nonstop advertising to get fillers. Botox. Implants. Ozempic.

      Constantly bombarded with it.

  • nullspace@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    I dunno, I think the tides of public opinion are shifting on ozempic. Mostly because of how absolutely awful being fat is on your body. Though, where it’s priced now it’s going to remain a designer drug for vain, rich assholes with a touch of sour grapes for everyone else.

    In my own opinion I wouldn’t even put it in the same category as those others.

    • FlyingCircus@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      Like most things, Ozempic is fine by itself. But when you put it in the context of a society obsessed with both unrealistic beauty standards and assigning moral weight to any perceived “flaw,” Ozempic is a fast track to returning to the eating disorder epidemic of the 1980s-2000s.

      Future historians will also note the coincidence of the meteoric rise of Ozempic with the rise of fascism. Making people feel bad about themselves is how the ruling class and patriarchy exert control. They want you to be unhealthily obsessed with your weight, just as they want you to be addicted to drugs, porn, video games, etc. The radical body acceptance movement was a direct threat to their power, and Ozempic has pretty much removed it from the conversation.

    • Lumelore (She/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 days ago

      Ozempic causes GI issues, such as paralysis, and numerous other issues like fatigue and depression because starving yourself isn’t healthy. Just exercise and eat a better diet. Exercise is so good for you that fat people who exercise are actually healthier than people of a healthy weight who are sedentary. No fucking way would I ever go on a weight loss drug.

      • nullspace@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        I’m not sure where you read that, but as far as I know it doesn’t cause people to starve themselves. It suppresses hunger so they eat a normal amount of food in an era where calorie-dense, hyperpalatable food is the norm.

        Diet and exercise is the gold standard, but some people just can’t regulate their diet for whatever reason. Be it discipline or genetics. Ultimately though it doesn’t matter because the bottom line is a staggering amount of people are at an unhealthy weight.

        Being overweight is so bad for your health that known side effects of a drug like ozempic are negligible in comparison. The ones we know about, anyway.

  • shweddy@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    Patriarchy

    e: Some dudes apparently can’t take accountability and they gotta downvote me to prove their point

    • vrek@programming.dev
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      Honestly I disagree. I rarely see men judge a woman for looks. It’s typically women judging other women for looks. I’ve never seen a man look down on a woman for not having painted nails for example but have seen woman comment on another woman for her nails being chipped.

      There was an old joke like “if you ever are about to have sex with a man and he comments about how your panties and bra don’t match… RUN! What is wrong with that person? No man cares, hell you’re about to remove them anyways.”

      Edit: men are dangerous for many reasons. Typically the opposite problem, they see a woman as too beautiful to refuse the desire to have sex with them. They rarely have the feeling of" well she would be pretty but seriously, that shirt with those heels?".

      • ChexMax@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        Idk if you’re a man or a woman, but that’s a wild take. I’ve definitely heard men nitpick a woman’s appearance, including chipped nail polish, but above all about weight, which is a big part of the original post.

        In my experience, women are more likely to talk trash about things easily changed: judging someone for clothes that don’t fit well or makeup that’s poorly applied, whereas men will trash women for body type, weight gain, and aging.

        And if you think a man is dangerous to a beautiful woman who rejects them, you don’t want to meet a man who is mad a woman “below” him has rejected him. That can be violent.

          • shweddy@lemmy.world
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            7 days ago

            Sexism is the systematic inequitable treatment of girls and women by men and by the society as a whole Its a form of internalized oppression which consists of oppressive practices that continue to make the rounds even when members of the oppressor group are not present

            • MiddleAgesModem@lemmy.world
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              7 days ago

              by the society as a whole Its a form of internalized oppression

              Why are women excused but men not? This is why people are downvoting you, you’re holding a double standard.

              Women are free from blame because it’s “internalized” by society but men are apparently immune to that same society? No “internalized” excuse for them?

              It’s pathetic and infantilizes women, it doesn’t defend them.

    • Zorque@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      I just want you to know that I’m downvoting you because the way you express your opinion is facile and simplistic, and honestly helps further the division you purport to critique. Not because I necessarily disagree with the general sentiment you believe you’re trying to convey.

      One word answers to problems are easy, but they rarely accurate enough to actually help solve the issue and generally are used to push people to extreme opinions. It’s much less effort to just spout a catchphrase to push people towards your own personal goal rather than get into an actually beneficial discussion about the ins and outs of how life actually works and how to solve real world problems.

    • MiddleAgesModem@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Women put pressure on other women too. Girls can be bullies in school.

      I’m not downvoting you, but I am disputing the assertion that only men uphold unfair standards.

      • Chloé 🥕@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        7 days ago

        patriarchy ultimately benefits men*, but all people can wield it for at least crumbs of power

        when you’re a woman who conforms to patriarchal standards, stepping on the women who don’t helps you look better in the eyes of men*, and so it gives you more power relative to the women you stepped on

        * i am talking about men as a social class here, not men as individual people. before someone not-all-men’s me.

    • LouNeko@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Wait I’m confused, if patriarchy is still a thing then why are all women in media strong independent “need no man” girl bosses now? Somebody please explain.