Jury nullification
Oh, I’d so love to be on that jury. Jury nullification, BABY.
So if throwing a sandwich at a police officer is a serious crime, there must be a backlog in the courts from all the shit nurses have to put up with on a regular shift for half the pay, eh? Police and ICE are the biggest, softest little crybabies there are in this world. And I’m including actual babies in that stat.
Well to be fair to the babies, they are like 1/100th the volume of these guys.
What a goddamn waste of time and money.
but it was the first sub attack on US soil.
I’m just noticing that the media doesn’t have to use the passive voice about criminal allegations when it decides not to.
Ooh lemme try my hand at this
“Investigation opened after government agent allegedly struck by flying culinary shrapnel, motive unknown”
I don’t think it’s a question whether or not he threw the sandwich, just whether or not that’s assault…
And pepper too. If you’re feeling especially spicy, throw in some oregano.
A jury trial for throwing a sandwich?
If they’re gonna overreact maybe make sure you’re getting your money’s worth, huh?
Remember that they tried indicting him with a felony and grand juries refused to indict him multiple times. Now they are trying to use this misdemeanor trial to make an example out of him but I have a feeling it will backfire spectacularly.
Exactly. They’re gonna put this guy on trial, and it’s just gonna remind everyone how cool he is and what clowns the feds are.
What is the charge? Sharing a meal? A succulent salami meal?
What is he charged with? Assault with a tasty weapon?
Aggravated butthurt.
Assault with a breadly weapon
Assault with a deli weapon.
Making pigs fly
what a waste of a panino.
We the jury find the defendant guilty of wasting a perfectly good sandwich, when samples of dog poop were readily available for throwing at fascists.
Such a waste
I should buy some salami sandwiches. To share.
New lunch special - salami sub, “soup for my family”, and a twisted tea
