Silent bathrooms are the fucking worst. When you go in, have to stand right next to some guy at a urinal, and you both can hear exactly how much piss is happening, or when it’s not happening. Nothing shrivels up my bladders ability to expend faster than complete silence and the attention of a stranger.
Also once I was visiting a foreign country and found a girl on tinder, we were fuck buddies for the duration. She stayed over one night, and I had to shit in the morning. With her sitting on the bed quietly scrolling her phone like 5 feet away. It was awful. Felt like I couldn’t fart, could barely get anything out, my diet had been bad so it was going to be a difficult poo anyway. It was awful.
But out in public, whenever I accidentally fart, or on purpose fart but I intended it to be silent, I just laugh immediately afterwards. If I think it’s funny, then it’s not awkward.
Silent bathrooms are the fucking worst. When you go in, have to stand right next to some guy at a urinal, and you both can hear exactly how much piss is happening, or when it’s not happening. Nothing shrivels up my bladders ability to expend faster than complete silence and the attention of a stranger.
Also once I was visiting a foreign country and found a girl on tinder, we were fuck buddies for the duration. She stayed over one night, and I had to shit in the morning. With her sitting on the bed quietly scrolling her phone like 5 feet away. It was awful. Felt like I couldn’t fart, could barely get anything out, my diet had been bad so it was going to be a difficult poo anyway. It was awful.
But out in public, whenever I accidentally fart, or on purpose fart but I intended it to be silent, I just laugh immediately afterwards. If I think it’s funny, then it’s not awkward.
People need to stop being weird about toilets. WE ALL KNOW WHAT GOES ON IN THERE.
I don’t need a rest…, I don’t want to take a bath…I don’t need to wash…