I refuse to make fun of dietary restrictions after spending five years as a waiter rolling my eyes at gluten free people and then developing a gluten intolerance.
The universe is a tricky bitch. It gave me a literal pain in the ass.
Has anyone stopped to consider how the grass might feel about this? I didn’t think so.
That’s why I only eat prokaryotes.
Have you ever stopped to think about how prokaryotes feel about that arrangement? That’s why I only eat silicates
Ain’t no good prokaryote 'cept one that’s enslaved or dead. Those freaky little bastards don’t even have organelles or a nucleus. MRSA, Botulism, Anthrax…we’ve been at war for billions of years. Long will I have been in the cold, cold ground before I recognize prokaryote rights.
Single cell cyanonacteria ftw though! They bow to no one, they’re self sufficient, they don’t enslave or eat others.
At first I thought this was telling me to fuck my friend in the mouth…
If only it was that easy. More fruit trees in cities for instance.
“I’m sorry?! Do you want homeless vagabonds rummaging around MY neighborhood, snacking on the fruits of MY trees?! I THINK THE FUCK NOT! ONLY MALE TREES! ALLERGIES YES, VAGABONDS NO!!!”
-NIMBYs, with funding by big agro
