Most people everywhere are slightly left of centre*. Most leaders everywhere are slightly right of centre*.

*Not in the American sense. Y’all crazy.

It never occurred to me that the shells would be edible. I mean, I don’t eat clam or oyster shells.

Anyone else see a two-headed cat?

I heard Money For Nothing earlier and more often, so it’s the other way round for me.

…you can do that?

I’m taking three days of annual leave between Easter and ANZAC day next month. I’ll be out of the office eleven days straight. Time to properly unwind.

Not for quite some time now. Not since I learned about the electoral college.

There will be a price. Don’t do this unless you want the fashion police to rappel in through your smashed windows and beat you while you choke on tear gas.

I tried it because it was the captain’s favourite. Regrettably, bergamot oil is not for me.

You can buy 2L beer containers in New Zealand, but they’re a specialty item. Largest I’ve ever seen at the supermarket or bottle shop is 1L.

As for coffee, it’s probably because our laws are weirdly restrictive on how much caffeine you can have in one drink. Energy drinks can’t contain more than an equal amount of coffee, for example.

It may be suicide.

No. Pretty sure the origin of that quote is a Shakespeare villain.

We’re small, and that means a lot of the problems facing America just pass us by.

I don’t have kids, but my cat thinks he deserves a turd in his shoe.

Hello from New Zealand.

Science: “How do you keep getting in here?”

God would sigh and hand your file to Satan.

You make it sound like this is your first experience with human beings.

The question mark specifically turns it into passive-aggressive political whinging.

Actions. I know too many people who ‘really meant to’ do that awesome thing but somehow never got around to it.