It’s easier to censor the books first. Don’t worry, the internet and its content will be fucked with soon enough(more than it is).

Wait, did they think the bathrooms were special and cost money? Many places just slap a paper “gender neutral” sign on their washrooms and call it a day until a nicer sign can come in. The really good places knew this shit ages ago and already saved themselves the trouble by putting in a shared sink area and having stalls with real doors. As someone who has literally had to fit washrooms into floor plans I can guarantee that if cost and ease were problems then we’d only have gender neutral washrooms.

We can also add: “because of increased communication, women are feeling more confident about ignoring all the shitty men who can’t clear even the lowest bar.”

Seriously, absolutely wild how low the standards are right now and how so many people still can’t hack it. Love is love, people will marry and even have kids with someone they really care for ni matter the situation but if they can’t find anyone who can handle a baseline level of respect for their personhood and autonomy, well, they certainly aren’t gunna be getting married or having kids.

Yea, we’ve all gotten so used to online shopping that we’ve forgotten what we’re allowed to do when it comes to local stores. I even worked retail in a motorcycle shop selling gear and ordered stuff from suppliers all the time.

To be honest, since most places ship from their physical locations(which may not have stock or carry something at all due to demand) and Amazon’s incredibly predatory practices it means that they are pretty much the only option. I’ve gotten stuff from Etsy as well(but it doesn’t help for, like, water filters and certain appliance parts), and I really have always tried to avoid Amazon, but there are just some things where they’re the only ones where I can buy some of this stuff.

And like I said, I’m gunna have to just start asking outright for stuff even if whatever store doesn’t carry it normally. It’ll take some patience but I’ll live.

There actually are things that one just cannot find elsewhere easily, and most of the places that reliably carry them locally are places like Walmart which aren’t better. That said, it’s always the very last place I look.

With all this nonsense I’m going to start asking local stores if they can order stuff for me, though, and just be extra patient. For example, it’s wild how little there is for mandolins at local music stores but at least the British strings I’m going to try switching to are there so that’s something.

It’s true that we all deserve to be treated with respect and dignity but we equally have understand how much easier that is for one group compared to the other. Us cis people have all the power, and trans people are basically forced to exist in a constant state of fight-or-flight.

I remember the kind of person I allowed myself to become when I spent 40hrs a week at a job that didn’t value me. I was overly defensive even outside of work, and my self-esteem was already crappy enough, and this led to judging others too harshly as well. I didn’t even have space to fully recognize that my now ex-girlfriend really did care for me and didn’t have the patience to realize that she was going through exactly the same shit. And that was just my job! Imagine if nearly every waking moment made you constantly ready for a confrontation.

I was ultimately let go because I “wasn’t a good fit”. What really happened was that people with more power than me were mad that I didn’t kiss the ring. I wasn’t mean, but I made the mistake of thinking these people were different because on the face of it they really did seem better. I thought it was safe to talk to them about pay and they led with gaslighting me and trying to devalue me, and any attempt to push back was “rude” and they had the gall to say “I don’t know why you feel you can’t talk to us about stuff”.

Now bring that into this space and you can see how unbalanced everything is. Of course we feel safe around them, we have all the power, and we have to understand that it’s not the same in the other direction. Just being trusted enough to be allowed to be present is a fucking honour we should be proud of.

Yea, it’s like going to a christian household for dinner and eating before grace. They don’t expect you to participate in the prayer but the least you can do is not start eating before they’re ready in their own home. And if they do a little grace for themselves while at your house you leave them alone. Sure it’s a little weird to sit their with a bowed head while they leave their magic diety a voicemail but it’s not harmful and they aren’t asking you to convert in order to eat supper.

The same can be said for being even vaguely accommodating for a vegan friend who’s visiting and not making them feel like they aren’t allowed to eat. They won’t stop you eating meat and the least you can do is make sure that forks for meat and vegetables remain separate.

I have several trans friends these days and two of them were friends all the way back in highschool, in a different city. They’ve recently found themselves distant from one another because there is a clash in ideologies.

One lays lower, goes about their business, and goes to queer events and all that stuff, though they’re still out there visibly trans. The other is very much an activist and will straight up yell at people on the street, I hear, and protests they organize have had at least one physical clash, to my knowledge. I can’t blame either of them, really, for the caution in these volatile times or the aggression when they’re pretty much the only group of people reliably standing up for their rights. The specific issue that came up was a whole thing, but suffice it to say there was a disagreement on tactics similar to what you mentioned.

Ultimately I think the no interaction thing is not a bad play. Allies or no, we aren’t them and while some communication is good sometimes it’s important to be reminded that we’ve entered someone else’s space. Not only someone else’s space, but space belonging to people who are constantly harrassed and feeling cornered just by existing and who will understably defend what little they do have with a maybe…overzealous approach. By the stories here are they handling it well? God no, that sounds wild, but my point still stands.

It goes for any margainalized group, I suppose, that by nature of being pushed aside one lives in a world where they must speak multiple “languages” and learn about how to live in more than one way. They end up generally being better people for it, but that doesn’t at all mean that every single one is better. For all the supportive, kind, and otherwise chill trans people there are still a very small handful who do things like forget who their allies are or even who go way off the deep-end and support the GOP or whatever equalivalent in their country.

And the worst part is that it is helpful to know what the person actively dismantling your country thinks about major issues. Or, in the American way, you can bury your head in the sand and pretend that these things will go away on their own.

Americans: “The French are cowards!”

The French:

—

Seriously, the French are constantly standing together against shitty policy and bad conditions and the US is constantly rolling over for people who only have the power they give them. Go France, you tell ‘em.

People are very stupid, you see. It really is incredible how much the news is like “hmmm, jury’s out, could really go either way” on shit where there’s essentially everything but Israel saying the word “genocide” but even then…

Lol are you trying to say I’m being racist towards US citizens? No, your country hates Latin Americans because of a myriad of eggregiously false claims and what is real is largely because you fuckers won’t quit meddling with their elections, funding para-military groups, or imposing embargos.

You(generalization) are not the victims, you are the problem finally meeting some consequences. I’d be so much more happy to help if more of you would acknowledge that but too many even in this very comment section are trying to avoid responsibility.

Americans trying to move to Canada. No fucking thank you.

I think that the last people I want here in Canada are the ones who run from their problems before even trying to protect their country from a hostile takeover. I don’t think you’re all the worst, I think that your best is rare and that most of you are not nearly as great as you think you are.

We have enough of that shit here and don’t need even more of that dead-end attitude diluting anything good we actually do have. Hell, I’m not even as active as I probably should be, but then again I’m not dealing with a fascist potential dictator currently trying to overthrow longtime allies.

I don’t care if you’re intelligent and hardworking, and frankly if that’s what you think I have a problem with I super don’t want you anywhere north of our borders.

I hope that my American friends who were already here for things like school can stay, and I hope that anyone trying to be a refugee from the US shitting itself can fuck off.

The US just screams and yells about how fucking great it is all the fucking time and now it’s imploding and, predictably, all people can think about is leaving. No, grab a spine from the fucking spine store and fix your bullshit. We have enough problems here without importing the laziest, most cowardly US citizens to add the list.

This isn’t a distraction, it’s a foreign government threatening us with an economic war specifically to try to annex our country and then doing the things it said it would do to try and make that happen.

The bar is “don’t hate Trump” and ya’ll’re barely hanging onto a majority in the regard only based on recent polls and you elected him with a majority. Your country is balls to wall towards the far-right and I don’t care for your worthless centrists, either.

I’m sorry you have to deal with this, but fuck the US and the vast majority of its citizens. Your “love” means fucking nothing to us.

They do have a point though, that it’s your mess to clean up. Unlike so many US citizens, many of us actually know that you don’t always need to blow something up, figuratively or literally, when it stops working properly.

We don’t want to “take you down”. We want you to finally start behaving your damn selves. Clean up your own fucking messes, we’re not your parents.

It’s an unstable country that enabled this to happen. Yes, there are a lot of people who would never do this awful shit but, sorry, this is what the US is and largely has been.

Trump is a symptom, it was the institution that is US and many of its people that allowed to get into power. You can’t just pin it on him and then when he eventually(please let it be soon) dies act like anything is fixed. The US is putin’s ally and there are many unfortunate people along for the ride. That is a truth you need to face or nothing will ever get better.