At some point, The Onion is going to have to close up shop. Because the absurdity of reality goes way beyond any satire they could dream up.

Destroys their entire business model 😂

That’s because Tesla is a data collection company, not a car manufacturer 😂

Turkey and South Korea

Two more countries to boycott? No problem. Fuck you both.

We need to guarantee payment to whoever steps up, and make sure that their family is looked after for life.

The Luigi who saves us all will be hailed as a hero around the world for decades. World leaders would congratulate them for preventing countless needless deaths, and future dictators won’t fuck around for very long before finding out.

My 90s bike.

Most of the components have certainly evolved when you look at a modern counterpart.

But it’s still fully repairable, serviceable at home or on the trail, extremely reliable, and doesn’t require any firmware updates or batteries to use 😄

• Cantilever rim brakes.
• Square tapered bottom bracket.
• Cup and cone hub bearings.
• External cables.
• Friction shifters (may latest “upgrade”!)
• Steel frame.

So much about it is “outdated”, but I love the hell out of it.

EDIT: Photo of my metal steed in “winter mode”. LOL

A friend of mine was a manager at a fairly upscale women’s clothing store.

She said that even at 95% discounts, they could turn a profit.