Alright, cool. Now lets take a tally of anti-vaxxers among the infected.

How’s THAT working for ya? Oh, me? I’m fine. I’m sitting over here in public, without measles. You know, on account of how I’m not an idiot?

Nope. Otherwise Nixon would have been unpardoned by Carter.

Well, assuming you believe in the afterlife, then it warms his whole existence to look up at you.

…you know. On account of being CONSTANTLY surrounded by fire.

No no no. Silly! Women were tied to stakes and burned as witches if they were discovered to know how to do math.

And speaking of which, I’m surprised a return to that wasn’t part of project 2025.

What do you think Chewbacca would do, if he ever met Cousin IT from The Adams Family?

Last night I turned off a small metalic lamp that’s next to my bed. I then heard a tapping sound like a small dripping water hitting the metalic lamp.

I turned the lamp on. I saw no water. The tapping stopped. I looked at the ceiling. No sign of water. I looked at the lamp. No water. Turned the light back off. Rolled back over, and got comfy.

Tap…tap…tap…

Turned the light back on. Tapping stopped. Still no water.

Turned the light off. The second the light was off, I heard the tap again.

Turned it back on. Still no water.

Got up, got out of bed, checked all around my night stand. Checked behind it. Nothing out of the ordinary.

While standing next to the bed, turned the light off. Tapping resumed.

Turned the light back on, and walked to the living room. Layed down on the couch.

Light on in the bedroom. I’m in the living room. Turn the living room light off.

Now there’s tapping inside the pipes inside the walls. Totally different tap. Totally different place. Totally different tapping sound. This didn’t sound like dripping water. This sounded like someone hitting the pipes with a wooden spoon with the same cadence.

Tap…tap…tap…

But it always stopped when I turned the light on.

So I went into the bathroom, and took a shower.

Now, here’s the kicker. I live alone. I have no pets. I have no rodents in the walls.

The whole thing came off like someone playing a prank on me. Except that person didn’t exist. It felt like I was living some 1930s comedy skit. Some Abbot and Costello skit. Except this is just me, alone in my apartment, going insane.

Or…OR…You keep posting shit posts here until…forever. You know. Because thats what community this is.

TIL Jar Jar Binks wasn’t some alien species. He was just Jamacian.

boop!

Wanna pet her!!!

Hey! Whoa! That’s not fair!

We only know he gave him a blowjob. We know nothing of if he spits or swallows.

I misread that as “chicken”, and was like “eh, there’s worse things she could have said…not MY kink, but nothing wrong with that.”

Then I read it again to make sure I read it right…oh…oh nooooooo.

Now I’m just sitting here, 99% sure that somewhere exists a woman who wants to have sex with a man who smells like fried chicken.

It’s forklift simulator…

I think he’s saying the pope is debt…maybe…I don’t know.

Take me back. I don’t like it in the future…

I always used this:

“I fucked your mom last night!”

“Ew. You need to get yourself tested…”

This is why he hates your propriatary blend of internet…

dresses up in cat costume

Dum-dum!!!

Can I have your steam deck? I promise to play games on it, and maybe watch porn on the toilet.

…really hoping this comment is dripping with sarcasm.